1964-1972 New York
Relocating to New York in September, 1964 was an inflection point in Sandra’s life. The relocation event was tuncertain until the final days before departure.. Her newborn sister, Nadia, was just 3 weeks old and the parents were considering many factors including, educational placements, financial viability, opportunity costs, etc. Family unification trumped all considerations.
Flying first class to New York, bypassing customs with diplomatic privileges, driven by 2 chauffered limousines, passing the 1964 Worlds Fair on the way to the Somali embassy residence in the middle of a UN general assembly session had a fairy tale character that was immediately countered by the budgetary realities of being part of the embassy residence of one of the world’s poorest countries.
Sandra was enrolled at St Barnabas school in South Yonkers, largely populated by the children of working class catholic families, and was the only black child in her class. During her 3 years at St Barnabas, she excelled academically, and was elected class President in her sophomore year..
Sandra was in the US but not of the US. Her parents impressed upon her that she was a non-resident alien on a diplomatic passport, whose US tenure could be interrupted at any time by forces beyond their control. She was a child of the 1960’s. with an international perspective. The anti colonial struggles in the global south, revolution and coup d’etat, superpower rivalry, racism and the civil rights movement and socialism in the third world were common discussion topics at home.
While at St Barnabas her friends were mostly Euro-American, and she operated in parallel realities, absorbing American pop culture, continuing catholic practice while appropriating Somali and Islamic themes, and attending UN and Somali events. In the summer of 1967 she participated in an upward bound program at Sarah Lawrence college that provided an opening to African American friends and lives, providing a welcome cultural relief. At the end of the summer of 1967 she was overjoyed that she had obtained a full scholarship to the UN school.
Sandra thrived at the UN school as the environment brought together many of her life’s themes. Her class of 45 had over 20 nationalities, it was multi-lingual, ecumenical and rigorous while being informal. It was a place where her background was the norm rather than the exception. Most of the students were self-described international misfits. Sandra excelled in Latin American literature and history, and was able to connect with global youth forums and Pan African culture. Sandra also explored Manhattan and developed a social life based on her school friends.
Sandra would often commute to the UN school with her father, and meet him outside the UN diplomatic lounge or at the Somali embassy. She met his colleagues, and was exposed to some aspects of his work, and to his priorities and concerns. She developed a special bond with him that lasted through her life. Sandra was accepted to attend Vassar College in 1969. Graduation from the UN school was notable in that she was acknowledged by the then Secretary General, U Thant.
Sandra was born and bred for the UN system.
Vassar college was the gateway for Sandra’s adult life. For the first time she had full personal freedom without parental supervision. Her first major choice was to take on a workload of 7 courses per semester that would enable her to graduate in 3 years and thus ease the financial burden on her parents. Her second major decision was to adopt Islam as her religion in her second year. Her third major decision was to accept an engagement proposal from Abdillahi Haji-Ahmed,, a Kenyan of Somali extraction, who she had first met at a Somali independence celebration at the United Nations in 1966. They met casually a few times until 1970. Abdillahi taught Swahili and African History and Culture at Wesleyan University. Sandra and Abdillahi were part of a Somali and East African network that spanned Vassar, Wesleyan, Trinity and New Paltz. Their connection was inevitable and immediately absolute. Sandra's accelerated study program enabled them to begin their life together in Africa in short order.
Sandra graduated, cum laude, in 1972. Her father’s consistent refrain regarding the debt that the family owed to Somali and African people who enabled his career and his children’s education bore fruit. As a Pan African, She accepted the responsibility and desirability of Africans educated abroad, returning to augment African human capital. This view was shared and reinforced by her new husband and most in her college and generational cohort. Their wedding, on September 9, 1972 was a joyous celebration of their love attended by family, friends and the top echelon of the UN diplomatic Corp, attracting much fanfare. The couple relocated to Kenya in 1972.
1972-1980 Kenya
After settling in Nairobi, Kenya, Abdillahi’s home country, Sandra took on the role of editor specialist for UNICEF. Sandra was a wordsmith. In private she was a prolific poet and writer of prose. Her career was not just a job but a calling, and she quickly carved out a niche for herself in the editing world. Her professional achievements were only one part of her story; Sandra was, above all, a deeply loving and caring person. She not only embraced her family, but reached out to a wide network of friends and associates.
Life as a young married woman was not without its challenges. The complexities of family dynamics often required Sandra to step into the role of problem-solver and caretaker. There were times when the family income could barely cover the needs of the large household. Sandra ensured that no one went without food, and that the school fees for her nieces and nephews—who lived with the family—were somehow paid. This often meant making personal sacrifices.
In search of better opportunities, the family moved frequently. Despite challenges, Sandra never let the weight of her responsibilities show.
Sandra prioritized her children despite her demanding schedule. She gathered everyone around the dinner table, asking each child about their day. These moments of connection were sacred to her. On weekends, Sandra and Abdillahi would pack Narura, Hodan, Halima, and their cousins into their white Volkswagen, for a drive and an ice cream treat.
In August 1980, Sandra came home earlier than usual from work. The children had finished their homework and were playing in the backyard when she called them together. With a mix of excitement and solemnity, she shared news that would mark a significant turning point for the family: they would be moving to Zimbabwe where Sandra had accepted a new job opportunity. Not all cousins would be joining them. Narura, Hodan, Halima, and Fathumo, Halima’s biological sister, would make the trip. The prospect of traveling by airplane for the first time filled the children with excitement and wonder.
1980-1985 Zimbabwe
In October 1980, the family traveled to Harare, Zimbabwe. They arrived at their new home, an empty house with red-carpeted hallways. That first night, Sandra transformed the prospect of a night on the floor into a great new adventure.
The transition to life in Zimbabwe was not without its challenges. The children had to adapt to a new school system with different expectations. Also, the new environment presented new racial issues and language barriers. Sandra worked with the children to meet the new requirements and encouraged her daughters to do their best.
She hired a household helper who spoke Shona, one of Zimbabwe’s primary languages, to assist the family in learning and adapting. Education remained a top priority for Sandra, and she ensured her daughters kept pace with their peers. She attended every parent-teacher meeting, cheered them on at athletics matches and swimming competitions, and even found time to bake cakes for school bake sales after long days of training and workshops at UNICEF.
The first year in Zimbabwe was a period of adjustment for the entire family. Sandra’s responsibilities at work grew, requiring frequent travel to rural areas for extended periods. She made a conscious effort to limit her trips to no more than a week at a time, ensuring her absence did not disrupt the family’s routine. During her travels, Abdillahi, who worked for the Zimbabwe Tourism Board, took on the role of primary caregiver.
Sandra enrolled Narura, Hodan, and Halima in a local Quranic school. She remained steadfast in her belief that a strong moral foundation was essential. Despite the girls’ initial resistance, she encouraged them to persevere, emphasizing the importance of faith and integrity. Over time, they began to take their studies more seriously, and by 1983, Halima, the eldest, had completed the Quran—a milestone Sandra celebrated with pride.
Sandra’s commitment to her daughters’ well-being extended beyond academics and faith. She made sure their weekends were filled with activities that nurtured their physical and emotional growth. Swimming lessons at a local hotel became a regular outing, and Sandra herself taught Narura, Hodan, and Halima to swim and dive, ensuring they felt confident and capable. She was particularly mindful of Halima’s diabetes, teaching her to manage her insulin intake and encouraging her to live a full and active life. Sandra’s own love for yoga and dance kept her fit and energized, setting an example of balance and self-care for her children.
Sandra rose to a leadership position within UNICEF’s Harare office, and earned accolades for her exceptional training skills and dedication. Her success, however, came with the bittersweet realization that their time in Zimbabwe was drawing to a close. United Nations policy mandated that staff members rotate to new assignments after five years. As her tenure came to an end, she was appointed to head the UNICEF office in Mogadishu, Somalia. The family had to adapt to a new country, culture, and chapter in their lives. Sandra made the transition as smooth as possible, by planning every detail.
1985-1987 Somalia/Kenya
With the help of her sister Marian, Sandra made the difficult decision to send Halima to a British boarding school in the south of England—Dover College. It was a painful choice, separating her daughter from the only family unit she had ever known, but Sandra’s unwavering belief in Halima’s independence gave her the confidence that her daughter would adapt and thrive.
During the summer of 1986, Sandra splurged on a well-deserved holiday to New York, where she and Narura were reunited with her parents and siblings. On the first leg of the journey they visited Sandra's grandfather and step-grandmother in Nice.They continued to London to visit aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, and nephews.
They continued their journey to the United States where Halima joined them. Together, they explored Manhattan, visiting iconic landmarks.The family’s holiday continued in California, where they caught up with Sandra’s college friends and their extended family. The final stop was Oslo, Norway, where they connected with Sandra’s sister Laila and family.
Just days after their return to Mogadishu, Sandra and Abdillahi received devastating news: While playing in ankle-deep water, Narura was attacked by a sand shark. The family was consumed by sorrow. It took many years for Sandra to work through the pain of that loss. The tragedy had left an indelible mark, and it became clear that staying in Mogadishu was no longer possible.
1988-2011 New York - UN staff
In 1987 Sandra was offered a new post as a Training Officer for UNICEF in New York. It was a fresh start, though the pain of Narura’s passing never fully subsided. Sandra channeled her grief into her work, dedicating herself to improving the lives of children around the world. She traveled extensively, organizing training sessions in countries such as Jordan, Iraq, Turkey, Syria, Gaza, Egypt, Madagascar, Seychelles, Ghana, Ethiopia, Sudan, Djibouti, Senegal, Namibia, Zambia, Botswana, and Mozambique. Despite her grief, Sandra committed herself to her work. She also devoted herself to guiding Halima in her pursuit of her Bachelors and Masters degrees.
In 1992, Sandra and Abdillahi adopted, Kamal and Jamal, Abdillahi’s twin nephews. Sandra organized a heartfelt birthday party, welcoming the twins into their new home. Their arrival brought laughter and joy back into the household. Sandra and Abdillahi devoted themselves to raising the twins, who became the center of their world. They enrolled the boys in nursery school and guided them through kindergarten, primary school, and eventually high school. Sandra and Abdillahi took great pride in their sons’ milestones, celebrating each achievement with love and enthusiasm.
In 1992 Sandra’s mother, Sheila, was diagnosed with cancer. Sandra divided her time between her own household and her parents’ home. Sheila passed away in 1997. Sandra traveled to Trinidad and Tobago to lay her mother to rest.
Sandra often organized family vacations to the Adirondack Mountains, Trinidad and Tobago, France, Norway, and Africa. These trips became a cherished tradition, with both Sandra and Abdillahi’s siblings and their families joining in. The gatherings were filled with laughter, bonding, and the creation of lasting memories.
In 1999, Sandra left UNICEF , where she had risen to the post of Chief of Organizational Learning and Development, to join the United Nations as Chief of Staff Development Services. In this role she provided oversight of staff development. She continued in this role until 2004 where she became a Director of the Operational Services Division/Strategic Planning and Staffing. She served as a key member of the Deputy Secretary-General's Management Task Force that highlighted priority action areas across the United Nations for improving human resources management.
As her responsibilities at work grew, she managed to balance her professional and family life. As the twins grew older, Sandra celebrated each of their milestones. She attended their school plays, sports games, musical performances, and private instrument lessons, fostering their talents and interests. Music was a constant presence in the household. Sandra played the piano and filled the home with music ranging from classical composers like Chopin, Beethoven, and Vivaldi to artists like Cat Stevens, Roberta Flack, Marvin Gaye, Lionel Richie, John Denver, and ABBA.
Sandra also found joy in gardening, transforming her yard with flowers, shrubs, and a thriving vegetable garden. Sandra’s love for cooking brought the family together, with weekend dinners featuring pot roasts, chicken drumsticks, mashed potatoes, and her beloved Trinidadian pilau. She made it a priority to gather everyone around the dinner table each night, ensuring the family remained close-knit.
In 2009, Sandra became a Director of Learning, Development and Human Resources Services at the UN. During her time there, she spearheaded the creation of a Learning Advisory Board that provided strategic guidance on learning and development for the UN and he she introduced a pilot leadership development program for both Under- and Assistant-Secretary Generals. Sandra brough her unique sensibilities to this role. She would incorporate poetry and rhyme into her learning modules. She retired from this position in 2011.
2011-2025 New York - Retirement, Consulting and Health Battles
It was then that her next phase of her career began. She earned a certification in Coaching from Columbia University’s Teachers College and began consulting for the United Nations and private companies such as Encompass and QED Consulting.
Although officially retired, Sandra became a sought-after facilitator and consultant to the United Nations in the areas of performance management, leadership, and career development.
Her true passion, however, was teaching. She developed curricula and taught graduate students at Mercy College and Lehman College, later coaching at UN Women and the United Nations System Staff College.
In 2015, Sandra was diagnosed with cancer for the first time. Though the prognosis was uncertain, she faced the challenge with determination and strength, defying expectations and keeping the illness at bay for nearly a decade. While she was undergoing treatment, she also managed the care of her father, who also battled with cancer.
Sandra took the lead in managing his household, ensuring his medical appointments were kept, and providing him with the comfort and companionship he needed. Her tireless attention allowed her father to live his final days with dignity and love.
Upon his death, Sandra took on the task of completing his memoirs. This project became a labor of love, a way to honor his legacy and preserve his story for future generations.
As the years went on, Sandra faced more challenges. During his freshman year of university, her son Jamal was diagnosed with a mental health disorder. Sandra and Abdillahi did everything in their power to support him, ensuring he received the medical help he needed. After many years of care, Jamal was finally ready to move into his own place, but his life was tragically cut short in 2020 when he succumbed to the coronavirus. To honor his memory, she established the Jamal Haji-Ahmed Memorial Scholarship and became involved with the foundation Search for Change, dedicating herself to helping others facing similar struggles.
In 2023, Sandra’s cancer returned. She faced this battle with the same courage and determination that had defined her life. Throughout her treatment, she was surrounded by a circle of love and support. Her husband, Abdillahi, stood by her side as her steadfast companion, while her children, along with her sisters, brother, and a few close friends, rallied around her.
In a beautiful and unexpected twist of fate, Sandra and Abdillahi discovered the existence of Matthew, Abdillahi’s son from a relationship that had occurred before he and Sandra had met. With her characteristic warmth and generosity, Sandra embraced Matthew, his wife Jessica, and their children, Elsie and Naomi, as part of her extended family. Though their connection came later in life, Sandra welcomed them with open arms, and they became a cherished part of her journey, adding warmth and laughter to her final days.
Despite the physical toll of her illness, Sandra’s spirit remained unbroken. Her strength, resilience, and radiant smile continued to brighten the lives of everyone around her. She faced each day with grace, optimism and love for life. Sandra’s kindness, creativity, generosity, and ability to find joy in the simplest things left an indelible mark on all who knew her. She was a beacon of light, a source of inspiration, and a testament to the power of love and perseverance. Though she is no longer with us, Sandra’s legacy lives on in the countless lives she touched, the values she instilled, and the memories she created. Her spirit will forever remain a guiding force, reminding us to live with courage, love deeply, and face life’s challenges with a smile.